Pressure

There are all kinds of pressures one has to deal with on a daily basis. Whether you are a teen, adult, male or female, mother or father. And often while one is going through these pressure filled situations there is always a question of "will I be able to safely and successfully, navigate my way through this?" Also the common "what will people say if they find out?"

As a natural people pleaser I often times avoided conflicting situations, went with the flow and always wondered what people thought of me and do the like me. Being liked by all was extremely important to me. 

Till I lost my mother a year ago when she lost her battle to Cancer. My gears shifted...in a big way. What was once important to me, no longer added value to my life. My loss made me more human and empathetic to others and how they felt. Societal pressures was no longer part of my vocabulary. The only thing that mattered was am I being a good mother to my son who now needs me and how do I best deal with my loss and am I doing all I can at the work place to earn my spot?

I know it's easy to get bogged down by these pressures, but allow me to share with you my truth. I can only worry about those situations I have  direct control over. Worrying about other people and their thoughts of me as an individual detracts me from my goal...maintaining my sanity through the loss of my mother and now carrying the responsibilities of leading the household where I once followed. The simple answer to how will I cope with these pressures, if there is such a thing, is this...

Many before me have done so! No one ever said it will be easy. My advice to you and inner me is "Chin up, focus on yourself and your goals! This storm you find yourself in will eventually pass and when it does, you will emerge ever the stronger individual for having seen this through."

The choice is always, a fulfilling life.

A Mother's Love

  

I recently read an article that was shared on Facebook by a friend of mine that had me in tears at the end and i felt compelled to blog about it.

A quick account of this story; its about a young american teenager from a small town getting a controversial article titled "if your are gay you can't be christian" from his teacher to read and summarise.

The son grapples with how to tell his christian mom who dislikes the gay life style that he in fact is gay. His mother's dislike for the life style didn't take him by surprise, but what became more difficult for him was how to deal with the reality of his family life and how to "come out" to his parents but more importantly to his mother. He did muster up the courage to tell his mother, she as expected "lost it" and he ran away from home to over night at a friends place. Before he left he wrote a note and left it behind for the mom that speaks of love and the unconditional love she is to have for him. The way he saw it his mom was so disgusted he only saw 1 option...to take his own life. This story rocked me to my core and was so beautifully and honestly written my tears fell freely.

This lead me down another train of thought, the depth of love a mother has for her children knows no bounds. It is true what I have heard said many times in the past that the worst pain for a mother is not the actual birth but in fact the untimely passing of the child ahead of the mother.  

I have personally witnessed this pain in the passing of my sister. That is the most I have seen and heard my parents cry. It's a pain no parent should ever experience similarly, a sight no child should witness.

So the question remains to be asked what would you do and how would you react to your child should he or she "come out" to you?

Personally...I would hug my son and let him know he is loved by me and that whatever the life style he chooses he will always be loved, a mother's love is, after all unconditional.

Trends

There are so many Trends one needs to follow in this day and age to ensure that you are on track with the world. Having said that, what does the word Trend actually mean? Well a dictionary definition says - it's the general direction in which something is developing or changing. To me the world is evolving at such a rapid pace that at times I just want to stop the world from spinning on it's axis so I could get off for a few minutes to compose myself. I mean really, all this spinning is messing with my perfectly coiffed look and my hair doesn't just fall into place, it takes work.

With the new nano technology being tested it is believed the iPhone5 will have this technology

Just the other day I was educated about a few things to do with Technology. Did you know that there is new technology that is currently being tested especially for iPhone users? This technology will specifically excite those who have accidentally dropped their iPhone causing it to crack. The new nano technology is currently being tested so when this happens your phone will be able to "heal" itself and in essence repair the cracks. Sounds very "I Robot" to me. But if it simplifies our lives, then who am I to judge? As long as all it does is fix the cracks in the phone and not try to do anything else more sophisticated. This promise of Nano Technology is as it turns out not just an emotional one but indeed a practical one as Apple is already using the nano materials technology in iPhone's, it is what makes the touch screen work. So iPhone users, you are in for a treat!

An example of a location you can "fancy" the Hanging Pool @Joule Hotel Dallas

We are in a Technological World of iPads, Tablets and Smartphones where apps rule. If there is something specific you like, trust me, there is an app for it. I also recently discovered an app called Fancy. You may know about it already but this app blew my mind. You can log on to it and connect it to anyone of the many social platforms you already belong to and the idea behind it is simple...you search for your favorite items and "fancy" it. You can view what other people may have fancied and other people can also view items or places you have fancied. You can if you wish request a store closest to you to purchase the item or a holiday. Yes, it sounds like that fridge that will order items you are running low on from your nearest supermarket, is not that far from existence!

Michelle Lee Collins far left explaining the application of NEON

Let's be honest, we are naturally aware of Trends that pertain to fashion, bags and shoes but something else I recently experienced totally blew my mind! There are Trends that pertain to make-up too. I attended a MAC presentation of the spring 2012 make-up trends that are all the rage abroad. Of the 4 trends that was demonstrated, NEON, was my favorite! I love and embrace color and what Michelle Lee Collins, senior stylist for MAC demonstrated made me giggle with glee! There is no discrimination in colors, the bolder the better. Please note this is not for the faint hearted! (You have been warned) If you have been lucky to seen recent fashion shows or pictures of it, you would note that Neon is a very bold make-up trend. Lips that could stop traffic and eyes that can make a man's heart melt.

Having said that, by far my most favorite Trend for this season will have to be the shoe trend I saw from Wilde Alice, which is a sub branch of Queue shoes. Ladies be prepare to enjoy your winter shoe collection and at their prices one can without breaking bank afford to purchase and enjoy these shoes.

Oh be still my beating heart!

Go forth and enjoy your Trends, no matter which category you fit into.

Pic from the new Levi's Ad Campaign...

It's my party and I will cry if I want to

I made a conscious decision early on in my life that I would not be one of those women who lie about their age, well mainly as I already am finding it difficult to remember my age and I don't want to one day sit back and think hard about my age like my sister did when her daughters asked her how old she really is. So when planning my party I drew up a quirky invite...

I never thought much of my age, so when people asked me I would state my age with pride! Putting it out there is what I do best! However after sending the invite I had a conversation that I did not expect when a friend called to say"Hey, are you turning 35?" Me: "Yes". Him: "Oh ok" *click* went the phone as he hung up in my ear. Thinking this a tad odd I slowly put my cell on the counter and as soon as I did he rang again saying "really 35?" Me: "yup, really, why?" *click* went the phone again. Damn it, I thought...am I really that old or do I just look good for my age? I would like to think the latter and that is where I left it.

The planning for my party started about 3 weeks prior. But things got hectic the week of. You know when you get that sinking feeling..."I need to take leave to make this happen" well that is how I felt about this bash, but I refused to let the party get the better of me! So I bucked up and did what I needed to to make it happen.

I loved my look for the night, the hair I thought about for a while, but so glad it worked with the 46664Fashion i received.

Glad my sisters Andrina and Desire could party with me!

Keeno Lee, Loyd Jansen and Chad Saaiman-great partying with old friends!

The gorgeous poet Blaque Pearl

3 of the gorgeous Davids sisters Tisha, Sasha-Lee and Terri

Gift Gwe also popped in to celebrate my birthday with me

My colleague, Mr Tapfuma Makina looking fresh!

What a special surprise, Miss Bianca Le Grange showing up to wish me and to party the night away!

Gillian from Black Pearl who helped with so many of the finer details pertaining to the venue

Egon Seconds and Conrad Jantjies, lucky me, I get a sandwich of hotness!

My photographer for the evening, the fabulous Peter Abrahams!

The girls having fun - Irit Noble, my publicist An Wentzel and my colleague Mel Jones!! 

Still going strong, Conrad, Mel, Chad, Junaid (co-owner of Black Pearl), Egon and Sebastian (co-owner of Black Pearl)

Claire Philips celebrating my birthday with me!

Really pleased my mates could be there, Ronald, Neil, PJ and Eugene

The toast...I'll drink to that!

Every girl should have a chocolate mousse birthday cake adorned with Lindt truffles, in a word..."YUMMY"

My man, Zahier! My rock and my everything!

Conversations and Lindt truffles

My party starter shooter, "taste so good makes you wanna slap yo momma"

Thanks Levi's, this was so thoughtful of you!

A huge and sincere thank you to everyone who came on board to make my 35th Birthday a special one! Thank you to 46664 Fashion for my gorgeous stripped dress that made me feel very Marilyn Monroe and the belt and bag that simply finished the look off completely. To Kiss for the delicious shooter vodka - party starter.  Laborie who kindly provided the sparkling wine that was delicious and perfect for the toast! SAB thank you for the Hansa and Brutal fruit. And a huge Thanks also to Elizabeth Arden for the Skincare the ladies received as parting gifts. Alto wine,  for the red and white wine and Lindt Chocolate...hmmmmmmm,  thank you for all the yummy truffles.

How I keep my spirits up

The Entertainment Industry is an unforgiving one at the best of times and on your worst day, there will be one idiot who will try and kick you while you are down. It has taken me a while to figure out what to do when I feel this way. On those really bad days, there are few things that really make me feel better. There are days when dark chocolate does the trick. Then there are days when the right combination of sushi just hits the spot... even a nice chilled glass of champers has the ability to lift my spirits.

When none of the above moves me out of that bad place - I turn to Ms Maya Angelou. She is a strong inspirational woman whose words speak to my soul. I have found many poems penned by her that I personally relate to. However, I would like the opportunity to share one in particular that reminds me that I am my own goddess. After reading it I feel my backbone straighten and and my inner being gently uncoil from the fetal position. My frowns become smiles and my soul feels rejuvenated.


I give you my feel good recipe...Maya Angelou's "Phenomenal woman"

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Maya Angelou 

Cheers to you!

Go on with your bad-self you Goddess! Make the most of the days you have on this planet and be a Phenomenal Woman!

J&B Met 2012, Made Different!

The J&B Met is synonymous with Spectacular Fashion, Delectable Dishes, Music that makes you want to "lahla umlenze" (literally to throw your leg) oh and to see the occasional horse trotting by! The most important thing about the day especially if you are in the J&B Marquee is to look fly and to make sure you fit in well with the theme.

My look for the Day

So you are asking yourself "what makes this look different?" Well for starters I got the dress and my day clutch bag from 46664Fashion which produces an interactive colorful look inspired by the life and times of Madiba. This is a Cowl Necked Maxi Dress in stretch Rayon and I love it! My hat was designed by The Little Hattery in Harrington Street, Cape Town and was uber stylish and did it's job to keep me cool for the duration of the Met. My sunglasses were provided by @PressRoomSA and are from the D&G range.  I accessorized with my gorgeous red Nine West puppies that my boyfriend forced me to buy... it was an excellent buy (but I have never told him that) the belt is from Marion Lindie and the watch DKNY from the SKeren Watch Group.

It turned out to be one of the hottest Met's by far, but the strong winds disguised it well. I had a great afternoon catching up with friends and acquaintances and when it all got too much for me i had to unwind...

This is Marianne

This is the gorgeous Marianne who gave me the best and well-needed massage - just about the most heavenly 15mins of my day! Marianne was just amazing! She had my feet feeling relaxed and rejuvenated and in no time I was ready to get back into the swing of things. Shortly after my my massage I ran into two great friends.

Tanya Nefdt and I go back many years and I love spending time with her!

Tanya Nefdt and I go back many years and I love spending time with her!

Ayanda Ntini from GHfm, what a lovely spirit and soul.  I liked her from the 1st day we were introduced!

Ayanda Ntini from GHfm, what a lovely spirit and soul.  I liked her from the 1st day we were introduced!

Between the 3 of us there was plenty to talk about to keep us entertained while the ladies had a touch up of make-up done. The cocktail of choice was the "Yellow Pony" that was in a word "Lethal".  I also took the opportunity to use the R20 betting voucher and the skill I had picked up a week prior to the Met at the Betting World sprint races to place a bet on the no.2 horse in Race 6. The stats were undeniable and I bet my R20 to place and won... R70! I felt great and decided to not place any more bets, cos after all, for some of us ladies who attend the Met annually it's not really about the horses; they just happen to be there too! (actually i was poep-scared it was just a fluke)

If you missed my previous blog, you would not know the love I have for shoes. Well, while hanging out in the J&B Marquee I came across a woman who shares my passion - Uyanda Mbuli!

Google her, there are photo's and videos of her gorgeous shoes, including the Louboutin's she wore on the day!

Google her, there are photo's and videos of her gorgeous shoes, including the Louboutin's she wore on the day!

I must honestly say even though this years Met experience in the J&B Marquee was smaller, it was definitely more sociable.

All that glitters...

I have been in Radio for 14 years. Yes...I said it, 14yrs. Wow, what a life I am leading! I often have moments where I pinch myself.  Those moments happen so often that at this stage in my life I don't bruise anymore. (just a little known fact about me) What I have loved most about my career is that every day has been different. What I regret the most is that I don't have pictures of all of those moments, like being on stage at Micheal Jackson's HIStory Tour and The MTV Staying alive Concert introducing Usher, Alicia Keys and P Diddy in one night on one stage. Those memorable times with Jascha Richter of 'Micheal Learn's to Rock' fame, Micheal Bolton, Celine Dion and more. I can tell you I have never gagged at the thought of any celeb, that is till I met Gordon Ramsey. Please believe this talkative woman didn't even have the words to ask to have a picture taken. You will also note that the said picture is not in the blog well cos the guy I asked to take the picture was shaking more than me and all you could see was a blur. I almost died when I took a look at the picture after Gordon had left. I thought I would take this opportunity to share some of the pics I do have on file with you!

The late TK and I, we were inseparable, whether it's Cape Town/Gauteng. I miss her positive "I can do anything" attitude

Ryk Neethling and Richard Hardiman, sandwiched between two good looking men - Yes Please! This pic was taken at the J&B Met 2011

The reports are in about Derek van Dam...DAMN he is hot!

Chad Saaiman, I love his aura, what a man, what a musician!

Brian Habana, before his move to the Stormers

Loyiso Bala, what an amazing man, humble and an amazing vocalist!

The SA Legends, Jaluka!

Danny K,this was too long ago, we both still look like babies!

Clint Brink, a super talented actor and muso and so humble!

Allistair Coetzee, WP Head Coach, one of those proud moments

Dr Rey, he is FINE, but has a serious case of verbal diarrhea

We all knew he was super talented, Emo Adams just took his time in achieving his goals...Love that!

Ferdinand Rabie and Charl Langevelt a couple of years ago at the L'Ormarins Queens Plate

Loyiso Gola, he IS funny!

Gift Gwe, all that sexiness and he can sing!

Herschelle Gibbs, talented cricketer and all round naughty boy!

Jonathan Butler, our finest export and such a humble man!

Kenny Thomas, 80's Legend. That is all!

 

Lionel Richie, he told me I gave good hugs and he wasn't the first to say so!

The shoe collection alone miss Patti Labelle had at he concert had me gagging!! She like me is a slave to OPTIONS!

What an amazing time I have had and continue to have. I can truly say I have lived and the best thing is there are plenty more of these moments to come! Don't worry my phone is always charged these days!